Handing in my resignation
This was a first for me.
I started a new job in April and two weeks ago I made the decision to resign. There were a couple reasons why I made the decision. I was going back and forth with myself for a while and I knew very early that it wasn’t the right fit. Something just clicked, and I was like ‘this isn’t for me’.
The onboarding process. Listen I am all for getting thrown in the deep end and really getting stuck into the work, but it makes it difficult when you haven’t received proper training, which I feel I didn’t. I don’t expect anyone to hold my hand, but when you hire someone new and they don’t get a proper handover, having structure and having someone sit down with them I think is really important so that they feel comfortable. The lack of structure in the onboarding process left me feeling overwhelmed and unmotivated.
Wasn’t enjoying it. I tried my best to stay positive and be kind to myself because I was still learning, but deep down I wasn’t enjoying it. The tasks and duties just didn’t alight with my career goals and ambitions.
I wasn’t happy. Going off the back of my second point of not enjoying it and not really enjoying the work as much as I thought I would. I’d be sitting at the desk and wasn’t happy.
The day before I resigned, I was in the office by myself and literally sitting there questioning my life’s purpose. I was like, ‘What am I doing here’. It’s a Monday, everyone is working from home and I'm in this big office by myself.’ I sent an email to my manager asking her if we could catch up. The nest day I sat down with my manager and I literally said, “I’ve made the decision to resign”. I raised things that I thought could be better and that was it. It was a quick chat which is exactly what I wanted. I was a little nervous beforehand because I didn’t want it to lead into a tough situation.
I sent quite a long message to my mum and dad. I wanted to give them a heads up and my mum’s reply was sweet. She said, “it’s important that you’re happy, so it’s ok Ces.”
I knew damn well what I was getting into and what the job consisted of, but running errands, doing the laundry, cleaning up after people and loading the dishwasher was not in the job description and I was thinking, “this isn’t what I want to be doing”. How hard is it to put a spoon in the dishwasher, especially when the dishwasher is empty? People leaving the dishes in the sink drives me up the wall.
I’m not interested in sticking it out in a job just because it’s a job. I did that for two years and I just stayed in a constant space where I was coasting, and I don’t want to coast anymore.
I think it’s a lot harder to make the decision so early, and I’m proud of myself for being able to call it when it’s still early days. It is better for the business to have someone who loves the job and is thriving, and unfortunately that wasn’t me, and that’s okay.
People naturally are going to have their opinions and talk amongst themselves about me not being there for very long, but at the end of the day, I have to do what’s best for me.
I didn’t have anywhere to go or another job lined up. I just wasn’t happy, so I left. I’m really proud of myself because I made this decision for me. For once I chose myself and put my happiness first.
I’m taking a leap of faith and betting on myself, and it’s been feeling really good.